Momwasright!Ifyousaythankyouforeventhesmallestgiftorslightestshowofkindnessyou’llfeelhappy.
GratitudesaysRobertA.EmmonsaprofessororpsychologyattheUniversityofCaliforniaisanimportantelementofhappiness.InhisrecenttookThanks!Emmonsusesthefirstmajorstudyongratitudetoprovemom’spoint.Inacknowledginganddevelopingthismuch-ignoredexpressionofthankfulnessheexplainshowpeoplehavebenefited----evenimprovedtheirhealth.
Asoneoftheleadingscholarsofthepositivepsychologymovementheadmitsgratitudemaybedifficulttoexpress.Headvisesyoutobeginbyadmittingthatlifeisgoodandfullofeventsandelementsthatmakedailyexistenceawonder.Secondrecognizethatthesourceoflife’sgoodnessismorethanjustyou.Thatsourcemaybeyourmomafriendpartnerchildcolleagueatworkorplayoranycombinationofthese.
Gratitudeisalwaysother-directednotesEmmons.Youcanbepleasedorangrywithyourselfandfeelguiltyaboutdoingsomethingwrongbutyoucanneverbegratefultoorforyourself.
Expressinggratitudeshouldn’tbeareaction;itshouldbeastateofmind.Tofeelgratefulwhenlifeisabreezeandyouhavemorethanyouneediseasy.Tofeelgratefulintimeofcrisis----angerhatredandbitterness----iseasier.Alsotoomanypeopleareawareoflife’sblessingsonlyafterthesearelost.
It’scrisisandchaos----dangerdiseasedisabilityanddeath----thatbringmanyindividualstorealizejusthowdependenttheyareonothers.Yetit’sthewayeachofusbeginslifeandendsit.It’stoobadthatsomanypeoplewastethosedecadesinbetweenlabouringundertheillusiontheyareself-sufficientsaysEmmons.
Theabundanceofvoicesexpressinggratitudefromhisstudiesofindividualswithchronichealthproblemsismany.ButEmmonsgoesbeyondhis“groundbreaking”sciencetomakehiscaseforgratitudebyincludingtheinspirationalwritingsofphilosophersnovelistsandsaintsaswellasthebeliefsofvariousreligionsandtheirrespectivescriptures.TakentogethertheseobservationsaresummedupquitenicelybyfamoushumanistAlbertSchweitzerwhosaidthesecretoflifeis“givingthanksforeverything.”
ToenableandembracegratitudeEmmonsencouragesthereader