To Make Love Grow
t took me years, though,to learn that the love surrounding our family didn't just happen. We
had to learn about love from one another. In fact, love never just happen--not even to people who
seem as naturally loving as my mother and father. But there is, I think, a climate that is best for love--a way of living that hastens the maturity of this matchless gift.
First, love nccds time. Perhaps people can fall in love in a moment, but mature love is like a tree, moving slowly from the seed in the ground to the sheltering splendor of its prime. People need time to dccpen their affection, to appreciate one another's differences, to share one another's joys and grief...
When we accept the differences of loved ones, we find that those very differences provide the mystery and wonder of human relationships. It's foolish to expect perfection; it doesn't exist. The key is to recognize and enjoy our differences.
To grow, love needs another, more elusive quality--the ability to let go.
Finally, love needs words to make it real. Without words, quarrels can' t be resolved, resentment can ' t come to the surface, we lose the power to share the meaning of our lives. There are many ways of communicating. The important thing is to acknowledge and express our feelings. If we don't, we deprive others of the knowledge of our love and ourselves of the joy that comes from expressing it.
Love is not a single act, but a climate in which we live, a lifetime venture in which we are always learning, discovering,growing. It is not destroyed by a single failure, or won by a single caress. Love is a climate--a climate of the heart.